Aftermath
by Chrikaru
Summary: HxR The past keeps a tight grip on its victims and the Gundam pilots cannot escape their memories.Heero is haunted by the Zero system as Relena fights to hold the fragile peace together. Could his nightmares hold the key to a better future? CHAPTER 6 UP!
1. Nightmares

Hey again everyone…you're probably wondering what is with the sudden spate of updates coming from me (and yet not the one everyone really wants, Job Interview) but in fact these are things I have written and are simply sitting on my harddrive.

I'm in a fatalistic mood at the minute with my fanfics…as in I'm just throwing them out there in the hope they will get some feedback, good or bad.

To be honest, re-reading any of my stories is usually torture for me as I see so many mistakes and things that could be phrased better, etc…and my hard drive is due a clean up so this is the last outing for many stories ( as well as their first in most part, lol)

So what I'm doing is getting a second opinion…I've been writing for years in hundreds of notebooks I always carry with me, etc and very few people have ever seen them but constructive feedback or even a kick back to reality is often what is needed to give an author some true perspective on their work

K, I really am waffling now, lol

I guess what set me off was seeing how many hits my Fruits Basket story got and yet not seeing many reviews appearing…got me wondering if it was really bad…I almost deleted it about four times yesterday…lol, I'm a paranoid creature

Okay, babbling over…just suffering nervous breakdown after final exams! lol

This fic is a fairly serious look I took at how the Gundam Pilots would manage after the war and ties in with another fic that I wrote a long time ago and am currently editing

Please read, enjoy and review if you feel like it – I appreciate all feedback!

* * *

Heero slipped into the cockpit with the ease of a lifetime's practice and waited for the familiar rush of adrenaline as the suit came to life beneath him. Nothing happened. A slight frown creasing his forehead, he quickly entered commands with a number of buttons around him. Still no response. In a fit of unexpected frustration he slammed his fists on the control panel.

"Why won't it work?"

When his fighting partner remained silent, Heero let out a wordless scream that seemed to have been building from years of pain, betrayal and anger.

When he needed his Gundam the most it deserted him, just like everyone else. The fury bubbled up inside him, drowning out the pain.

"Why?" he yelled once more, almost without hope for an answer. The silence flooded around him, pressing on him like a dead weight. His voice dropped to a whisper, "Why?"

"It's dead, Heero. Can't you see?"

The voice came from behind him, but he knew there would be nothing there even before he looked.

"It's gone, Heero. It's over"

"No!" he argued, the uncharacteristic anger still churning in his stomach.

"Yes!" answered the voice; with the calm certainty of knowing there could be no doubt in the matter.

"It can't…" Heero began.

"It can!" The voice interrupted, seeming to know where his train of thought was heading, and determined to stop it.

A sudden urgency seemed to pervade the very air as the voice continued.

"You've got to let it go, Heero. It's dead and gone. You're alive and you can't let yourself die with it. Let it go…please, just let it go"

Heero imagined the voice was growing more distant and the cockpit faded around him as though he were drifting off to sleep. The vision disintegrated into a million shards of black and white.

A second later he opened his eyes to reality. Fifty-four minutes later he was walking through the front doors of the Preventer offices. His normal route was up 7 flights of stairs, but they were being cleaned so he would have to settle for the lift or risk slipping and making a fool of himself while scaling them.

As he entered the lift, a familiar voice yelled from behind him.

"Hold the door!"

Heero stuck his foot in the aperture just in time for Duo Maxwell to skid into the elevator.

"Hey Buddy!"

Heero nodded a reply, but couldn't help staring at his friend.

Duo seemed unaware of his scrutiny, stifling a yawn while he made up his tie. Duo's prize possession and crowning glory, his hair, was messy and unbrushed and his eyes were badly bloodshot. The bags under his eyes were as pronounced as smudged bruises caused by unexpected blows.

In short, he looked like hell.

Heero couldn't help himself

"What happened?"

"Do I look like something happened?"

Duo countered quickly.

For someone who acted so open, he was jealously secretive about the things that really mattered. People got so caught up with the grin and the inane chatter that they didn't realise that Duo hadn't actually answered their question at all.

Relena had often joked that Duo would make a good politician because he was so good at concealing his emotions.

Heero considered saying more, but eventually decided on the characteristic one-word reply

"Yes"

Duo didn't bother teasing his friend about his verbal constipation (that being his current favourite phrase) so Heero knew something was definitely up.

Duo sighed, seeming to have come to some sort of decision.

"Well if I don't tell you, you'd probably find out anyway…Hilde and I had a bit of a bust-up at the weekend"

Heero couldn't hide his surprise. Hilde and Duo always seemed like the perfect couple; they complimented each other so well. Whether they were simply friends or something more was a question left unanswered. Outsiders were never quite sure just what their relationship actually was and Duo, as usual, didn't enlighten them.

"What about?"

Heero was intrigued, despite himself.

Duo shook his head, not seeming to know where to begin.

"I guess…I guess it's really because I can't let it go"

Heero's interest sharpened, "Can't let what go?"

It seemed strangely important to him that Duo's choice of words were so similar to those from his dream the night before.

Duo sighed and glanced quickly at his friend before looking away.

"The Gundam"

There it was.

In two words the unspoken agreement they had held to since the end of the Eve wars had been broken.

So many memories and so much suffering; encased in two words. Heero braced himself as a wave of half-forgotten emotions washed over him. It was hard enough facing his nightmares every night, but hearing someone else speak of them so casually opened an old wound he had thought healed.

He closed his eyes so Duo wouldn't see the raw pain in them, but he needn't have bothered as his friend had fixed his eyes firmly on Heero's left shoe.

Duo continued quickly, not giving Heero a chance to reply.

"Well, you know we work with the Sweepers in salvage…and there's any amount of mobile suit parts drifting around up there from the wars. I even found some Gundanium on an abandoned resource satellite"

He paused, took a deep breath and launched in once more. It was obvious that the Gundam had been preying on his mind for some time now.

"And when I had them all in the yard it was like a jigsaw…I could see pieces that would fit together to make a suit. So I just started tinkering…and it was like therapy or something. All I could think about was that I'd have my buddy back again and then I could fix everything like when I first came to Earth…and…and then Hilde found it on Saturday"

Heero kept silent, knowing anything he said would be inadequate but his mind was racing.

Duo had been building a Gundam!

Heero felt an unfamiliar ache in his gut…with a Gundam they could fix everything.

All these rebel groups, all these pretentious politicians convinced that they were the only ones who knew how to reform the new world, all the kidnappings and terrorist attacks from political minorities who wanted to be heard…everything could be fixed in no time.

A cold chill spread across his skin, just like when he prepared himself to pilot during the war. It was all so simple…he stopped his thoughts knowing that they could only lead to trouble.

The world was at peace now, fractured though that peace may be. And a world with a Gundam in it would never truly be at peace. Just like he had once believed a world with Gundam pilots in it could never find peace.

Another chill spread through him as he realized the implications of what Duo had told him.

What if the media got hold of it? He could already see the headlines: "Preventers secretly building weapons of mass destruction"; "Gundam pilots prepare to take over the world by force" and so on.

It would be a diplomatic disaster.

And Relena was already worn to a ghost of her former self with the strain of trying to hold the peace together single-handedly…

Heero tuned back in to what Duo was saying.

"Did I ever tell you why Hilde joined the army in the first place? Her parents and her younger brother were killed in the crossfire of a mobile suit battle inside the colony. She joined to stop anyone else getting killed needlessly…and she was so upset when she found my suit. It's already been hard for her to accept just how many people have died at my hands"

Duo broke off, looking at his hands with an expression of intense hatred. His eyes were so full of conflicting emotions that Heero found it hard to meet his gaze.

Duo held Heero's eyes with his own, daring him to listen and face the fact that they could never leave their pasts behind. No matter what they did or who they became, the Gundams would always cast an indelible shadowover their lives.

"She asked me if it's impossible for me to live without fighting…and I'm starting to think that maybe she's right. Maybe I can't live without war and death. After all, that's all I've known my entire life…I am the bringer of death…and now…now I don't know who I am or what to do"

He let his chin fall to his chest, fists trembling at his sides in an unusual show of emotion. Heero's mind was working at lightning speed.

The warning light flashed on the elevator telling them they were almost at their destination. Heero spoke quickly, his voice urgent.

"I might be able to help you, but we can't do anything until after work. You have to get through today without anyone suspecting anything.

Go straight to the bathroom and fix yourself up before anyone sees you… I trust your mask can stand another day's wear so I'll cover for you with Lady Une"

Heero took a deep breath after his spiel and looked at Duo, hardly hoping the other ex-pilot would take his advice. It would be a rare day for any one of the five to ask for help in anything.

Duo grinned, a watery gleam in his eyes betraying unshed tears. But to someone who didn't know him the tears would be invisible. True to his mask, you barely noticed the pain in his gaze when your attention was taken up by his smile.

"Wow! That must have been your word allowance for the week"

Duo attempted a light tone with a weak joke.

"I guess you have verbal diarrhoea now instead of verbal constipation!"

The doors snapped open and Duo had disappeared down the corridor before Heero could think of a good comeback.

* * *

Okay everyone, this fic may or may not continue…it kind of ties a lot of loose ends together from other fics I have set after the series and OAV.

It does deal with couples and their relationships, mainly Heero and Relena, Duo and Hilde and Zechs and Noin with others being hinted at, but the main focus is on the other bonds that exist between the characters (not just love but friendship, etc) and how such different personalities work together.

Please let me know what you think…however continuing this fic will take second priority to getting a few more chapters of Job Interview out so don't worry about it slowing me down any more(will hopefully update that a little faster now I have some more time on my hands…not much more but more nonetheless, lol)

Okay, I'm signing off…early hours of the morning here and sleep beckons, lol

See you all again soon!

Chrikaru


	2. Sunlight

Hello again everybody! People waiting for Chapter 11 of Job Interview…please don't kill me! Rest assured it will be posted tomorrow so please let me live!

Lol, Anyway, back for Chapter 2 with this fic – hope you enjoyed the first one and thanks to my reviewers!(Individual thans at the end) You gave me the kick I needed to write this chapter and I had a lot of inspiration for this fic so I've written a few of the later chapters too (now just need to do the bit in the middle, lol)

Please read and review!

* * *

After Duo had left, Heero ran through his hastily created plan in his mind. First of all, whatever it was Duo had been building would have to be transported to a safe facility where they could decide what to do with it.

Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, Lady Une had to be persuaded that the plan of action he had created would be the best way forward. Checking his watch to ensure he would be on time he strode forward and knocked smartly on Lady Une's office door. When she bade him enter he dispensed of the traditional greeting and started the conversation with,

"I think we've made a big mistake"

Lady Une frowned, then smiled, showing the two faces she had worn during the war.

"Is a simple good morning too much to ask for? Besides, Preventor Yuy, I summoned you here for a briefing about an essential mission so, whatever your problem is, it must wait until after the meeting"

She met his eyes with a steely glare as he opened his mouth to argue and cut him off with one word.

"Afterwards"

Another Preventor watched the exchange curiously from the seat he had already taken around the commander's desk.

Heero nodded to him and then took his seat, waiting for the other's to arrive. Two other Preventor's arrived shortly after him, followed by another one until they were only waiting the arrival of Duo Maxwell.

Lady Une tapped her foot impatiently as she glanced at her watch and Heero interceded onDuo's behalf.

"Preventor Maxwell had an errand to run. He asked me to pass on the message that we may begin without him and he will read up on all necessary literature before the next briefing"

"Is that so?"

Lady Une gave Heero a querying glance but he remained complacent and she started her presentation without further comment. Duo turned up about halfway through and slipped quietly into a seat, grimacing at the pile of sheets Lady Une handed him. As the Preventors left at the end of the meeting he sent Heero a wry grin, but he chatted with the other men as if nothing were amiss.

As the door closed behind them Lady Une once more took her seat and invited Heero to do the same.

"Now, Preventor Yuy, you have my attention for…"

She checked her watch and the looked back up.

"The next eight minutes. Make it worth my time."

After he had finished outlining his proposal to Lady Une she simply looked at him with one eyebrow raised.

"You expect me to approve this project?"

Heero opened his mouth to outline the arguments in favour of it, but Une raised her hand to stop him as she lifted the phone.

"I'm not the one you need to persuade, Preventor Yuy"

She smiled sweetly as she dialled an extension, but her eyes were sharply amused.

Heero felt his hopes fall, and his suspicions were confirmed as a secretary picked up the line and Une spoke.

"Is Miss Darlian engaged at the moment? No? Yes, straightaway please. Thank you very much"

Heero gave Lady Une a dark look, but she ignored it.

"Miss Darlian's waiting to see you, Preventor Yuy. I trust you remember the way to her office?"

Lady Une opened her office door and ushered him outside. Heero shot another glare over his shoulder but she ignored it.

After the door closed, Une returned to her desk and phoned her secretary to cancel the remaining two appointments she had before lunch. Though she had feigned disinterest when Heero had been speaking the points he had made stuck in her mind like barbs. What if his plan were the best way to succeed? Shutting out the rest of the world, she seated herself at the computer and began some serious research.

Heero tried not to glare at Relena's secretary as she shot him another coy glance from beneath her eyelashes. When this was followed by a inviting smile he turned away and pretended to be fascinated by the view outside the window. The girl knew he was coming – he had heard Lady Une make the call himself! – but she still insisted on going through protocol and phoning Relena to inform her of his arrival.

"She's expecting you, Mr Yuy"

There was a suggestive undertone to those words that made Heero uncomfortable. Too many people seemed of the opinion that he and Relena had been, were in or were going to be in a romantic relationship. Heero nodded curtly at the secretary and opened the door to Relena's office.

Because of the records from the war being sealed by the government, few people knew that he had been a Gundam pilot, let alone that he and Relena had known each other then, but there was still talk. Nothing more than an office rumour that the two of them were somehow involved, but it bothered Heero nonetheless.

So far he had made no comment on the rumour, believing that to acknowledge it would be to give it weight while Relena seemed to have adopted a similar policy, refusing to be drawn into conversation on the topic of her personal life and admitting or denying nothing. A denial would possibly persuade even more people that there was something being covered up and Relena had seen this evidenced in both parliament debates and inter-office romances.

Relena stood up from her desk to greet him and the sun glinted off her hair. Almost one entire wall of her office was glass and sunlight streamed in, making the office bright but somewhat stuffy despite all the windows being open.

Heero glanced at the paperwork on her desk and raised his eyebrows at the title on the top document. It was a proposal for further bases on the Moon and how these could coincide with the terraforming project on Mars. The terraforming project was Relena's personal interest, though it was unlikely to be completed within her lifetime. Recently she had been arguing with the government that the project needed more funding and personnel but progress was slow. Judging by the bags beneath her eyes that she had tried to hide with makeup, she had probably been working to all hours to persuade the conservative majority.

Relena caught his glance and laughed softly, rubbing a hand across her tired eyes.

"Yes, I know, I've been practically eating, sleeping and breathing these proposals the past few weeks!"

She sighed deeply and perched on the edge of her desk.

"Even with all the changes we've made since the war, there are still those who want everything to stay the same. Sometimes I feel like I'm beating my head against a brick wall trying to get through to them"

Heero shook his head in reply.

"You shouldn't let it wear you out so much. They'll come around in the end – they always do…it's a testament to your persuasion skills"

Which is another reason I don't want to argue with you, Heero added silently.

In the past he had sometimes felt that Relena's idealism blinded her to reality, but now he respected that she could not allow any departure from her ideals for fear of one concession leading to another until the entire system of beliefs collapsed. And although her solutions to problems didn't always seem the most practical to his soldier's mind, he respected them nonetheless, realising that her reforms were necessary for the continued peace of the world nation and the colonies.

Feeling uncomfortable with sitting down he crossed the office to stand at the window. Relena followed him a few seconds later, standing just close enough that he would touch her if he moved, but not so close that she was encroaching on his space. For a few moments they simply stood in silence, each comfortable with the other's presence. Relena was one of the few people Heero knew who could enjoy a silence and not feel the need to fill it with mindless chatter.

His hand brushed hers as Heero turned to check the clock and he caught her small smile. Their hands hung co close together that he could feel the heat, but neither made the move to entwine their fingertips.

Relena waited for Heero to speak rather than immediately asking him the purpose of his visit. He always took his own time to prepare his arguments and she never minded his visits taking a little longer than the prescribed appointment. Her face softened as she watched him staring out the window, but she knew he wasn't really seeing the scenery laid out below.

When he eventually did start speaking all traces of a smile disappeared from her face and her eyes widened in shock.

First of all he outlined what Duo had told him and Relena's mind reeled at the possibilities. If the press found out it would be a disaster.

She started to speak, then stopped herself; Heero would have already considered the implications and planned appropriately. She had heard enough now to know that Heero was not giving her this information for the sake of the information alone, but that he was leading up to something else. And if he were seeking her approval on the matter, it would probably be something that could be construed as making preparations to fight.

In truth, it was unrealistic to expect the peace to last forever and despite Relena's force of will in forging the peace, another war was inevitable, sooner or later. For this reason she considered Heero's arguments as he laid out the second and more controversial part of his plan rather than dismissing even the thought of taking an action that could be interpreted as warlike.

His premise was simple; set up a group of Preventors who would keep abreast of any military developments and ensure that they would not be completely unprepared if it did come to war once again. Intelligence networks already kept them informed of the actions of industrialists and political factions nationwide and the two combined would lead to an efficient response if peace were ever threatened.

Relena nodded, but brought up a point of contention.

"But if the Preventors maintain peace through force, we will be little better than the dictators of the past"

Heero turned towards her.

"This unit would enable us to deal with threats before they become a problem. Wasn't that the whole reason the Preventors were formed in the first place? We need action to back up our words or the enemy won't take us seriously"

Relena smiled despite herself. Heero was eloquent when arguing in favour of his cause and she enjoyed the chance to spar verbally with him.

It was then that he introduced the other level to his argument: the Zero system. Relena didn't know much about it, except that it engaged directly with a pilot's brainwaves and could sometimes lead to irrational actions and that it had been used to control the mobile dolls. The system had since been locked and all information on its operation and creation locked to the public.

Heero was proposing to revive the Zero system in a custom-built module in Preventer headquarters. It would pose no direct danger as it would be unconnected to any weapons systems and it could possibly be used to find solutions to problems and to predict the outcome of various actions taken against rebel groups.

"But Heero…didn't you use that system during the war? Both you and my brother did and it seemed to affect you so much…"

Relena trailed off as Heero looked down, his eyes darkened by pain. Her voice softened.

"I'm sorry to bring up old memories, but I would be worried about the effect it could have on you, even now"

Heero looked up in surprise and she answered his unspoken question with a smile.

"Well it was obvious you would be performing the tests on the system. Quatre is too involved with politics to do it and my brother is caught up with the terraforming project on Mars. That only leave you because you wouldn't allow someone else to try it"

Heero allowed himself a small smile. Relena's perception still surprised him, even after knowing her for years. It was that skill of empathy and almost uncanny insight that had allowed her such success in politics, despite having received no formal training in her chosen career.

"I would feel more comfortable if it were installed with monitors to gauge your mental and physical health. And, of course, I must be kept up to date on what happens and…the fewer people who know about this the better. If anyone in parliament found out…"

She let the thought drift and Heero nodded as he replied.

"Thank you"

It had not been as difficult as he had feared to make Relena see his point of view. With grumbles in parliament she had probably realized that another war could not be avoided without some action on the part of the Preventors.

Her face lit up with a smile and the bags beneath her eyes weren't so noticeable. Unconsciously Heero moved closer, meeting her gaze with his own. After a few seconds Relena became uncomfortable with the intensity of his stare and she looked down, glancing at her watch.

"It's almost lunch. Would you like to order in?"

Heero considered for a short time before nodding.

Relena usually liked to get out of the office for lunch but she knew Heero was uncomfortable going with her to one of the local cafes as they were guaranteed to meet someone from work.

Everyone else tried to pigeonhole the relationship between Heero and Relena, but she was happy to let it be without trying to make it conform to stereotypes. Yes, they were friends but they weren't lovers, contrary to popular belief. And being with him made her feel so calm that she was loath to do anything to ruin what they had.

Picking up the phone she mouthed "The usual?" at Heero and he replied with a nod so she ordered for them both. She sat down at her desk and waited for Heero to do the same. There was another short silence before they began discussing in earnest what had only been mentioned before.

The room could be modified and the system installed in a matter of weeks, less if Heero did it himself which was preferable to keep the number of people involved to a minimum. Relena could not shift her anxiety that using the Zero system once again would harm Heero, but he dismissed her fears and forced his own doubts to the back of his mind.

It could be the answer to the myriad of problems that forced to split the peace and it could protect millions of innocent people from getting involved in a war and losing their lives.

Regardless of differences in beliefs, Relena and Heero were united in that they would both do anything before they would let that happen.

* * *

There you, Chapter2 complete and I'm not going to hazard a guess for Chapter 3 because my estimates are always wrong. I know it won't be any earlier than end of July as I'm away from tomorrow night until July 24th and then I'm back to work (yuk!) Anyway, thanks once again to everyone who read and an extra thank you to those who also reviewed. Hope this chapter meets with your approval too!

Sakura123 – Thank you so much for your review – it really cheered me up when I was feeling extremely discouraged about my writing. Glad you enjoyed it and thanks for the idea of searching for fics by rating (I always just enter a random page number in the search, lol) The Zero system will be very important in this fic as will its effect on Heero and the other pilots. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter and thank you once again – really appreciate it!

EquineAngel – Thanks very much for your review and for adding it to your alerts (I'm so flattered, lol) This will eventually be a Heero/Relena fic (you can see some of that in this chapter) but the main focus will be on the Zero system, not romance, though it will be there somewhere because I can't resist – romance and angstgood, lol. This chap also shows some of Heero's plan but it's really only the tip of the iceberg! Anyway, thanks and hope you liked this chapter too!

Pureevil230 – I'm scared…lol, your review made me laugh so thank you so much. I don't know what was wrong with me…just read back over some of my stuff and saw so many mistakes that it depressed me! Oh well, nothing to do but move on. Part of Heero's plan is revealed in this chapter but there is more to come so hope it keeps your interest! Thanks again! (and for adding it to your faves and alerts…makes me feel happy!)

LadyMR1 – Relena's in this one so you can maybe see the beginnings of how she will be involved in it all. There will be more info on Heero's plan next time as well as how they deal with Duo's creation. Thanx for your review, btw – it made me actually sit down and type up the next chapter to post…I get distracted so easily that I probably wouldn't have done it without the reminder! Hope you enjoyed this chapter too!

Hope to see you all again soon! Please review!


	3. Preparations

Hey everyone! Welcome back for a third chapter of Aftermath. The narrative may seem to be quite disjointed, as it is a series of interlinked studies to give some background for the rest of the story. Please bear with me, as this chapter is essential for the rest of the story….and the next chapter will be very good fun..at least it was for me writing it! (Alert for Heero and Relena fans – look out!)

Job Interview fans – am currently working on Chapter 12 but moving quite slowly due to work, etc. Will possibly be posted after the weekend so watch this space!

Thank you to all reviewers and please review this chapter too!

* * *

Wufei looked up sharply as the door to his office opened without ceremony. He locked gazes with the intruder for a few seconds before conceding the unspoken challenge and returning to the report in front of him.

Heero Yuy took the office seat on the other side of the desk and leaned back, waiting patiently for Wufei to address him. There were only a few people whom Heero would wait for and Wufei was one of them. It was almost a game of sorts to see who would break the silence first, but the relationship between the pilots had always been competitive.

Finally Wufei looked up, meeting Heero's faintly amused eyes with his own impenetrable ones.

"Okay, why are you here?"

Heero answered without pausing.

"I need your help"

A slow smirk spread itself across Wufei's face.

"Yeah right, Yuy. Don't waste my time – why are you really here?"

"I want to revive the Zero system"

The widening of Wufei's eyes would have been imperceptible to the casual observer, but Heero Yuy noticed and recorded the reaction.

When Wufei didn't reply, Heero continued.

"I need some materials to build the test module and I need you to juggle the inventory figures so it looks like nothing's missing."

"Why don't you just do it yourself? Security hasn't stopped you in the past"

Heero grinned, but it was a joyless expression. On his face, that grin promised nothing but pain.

"Yes, but if there were traces of hackers in the system an external assessment could be ordered and Relena doesn't want this action to become public"

Heero watched Wufei process the information that Heero had already cleared the venture with Relena and kept silent, knowing it would be better to let Wufei come to his own conclusions.

The internal security officer fixed Heero with a stare that could only be described as next-door to a glare.

"Just tell me one thing; are you sure that this is really going to help? Or is it some remnants of the Zero system telling you what to think? Remember, I've seen that system in action…we all have and some things…some things are better off left alone."

Heero nodded grimly, but didn't speak. Wufei searched his eyes for the answer before turning back to his computer and speaking casually, as if they were discussing the weather.

"Take what you need. I'll sort it out"

Wufei looked up once more as his office door closed behind Heero and frowned. He had agreed to Heero's request but something about the whole situation felt wrong. He had meant what he said – some things were better off never being reawakened and the Zero system was definitely one of those things.

* * *

Heero strode along the corridor purposefully, an inner monologue of calculations and lists running across the back of his eyes.

He had already researched rooms in the Preventer building and found the perfect place to set up his test module. It was on one of the basement levels that were seldom used for anything but storage. The level Heero had chosen was perfect for his needs, as it stored old and outmoded equipment and was therefore rarely, if ever, visited. There he could operate the system in peace and safe from detection.

Lost in his thoughts Heero barely noticed the people moving out of his way as he cut a path through the crowded corridor. Some looked after the silent Preventer, perhaps wondering what thoughts ran behind the impassive mask he wore.

Heero Yuy: rumoured to be one of the Gundam pilots during the war…making him one of the deadliest people alive if that were true. He was a human enigma as nobody had seen the man behind the uniform, but it only took one look in his eyes to know that he had seen far more than his years and that Heero Yuy was one man that you did not cross.

* * *

Trowa brushed sweat from his forehead as he stood up and stretched the cramped muscles across his back.

The team of mechanics and Preventer's around him were also sweating profusely in the heat of the summer's day. They had been working for hours on safety checks and updates for the patrol vehicles that would be needed for security at a political summit the next week.

Trowa shielded his eyes with one hand as he looked up into the cloudless sky outside the warehouse they were working inside.

He felt restless, like he was waiting for a battle to begin but didn't know when or where it would start.

Lady Une had insisted on more patrol vehicles being brought into the service, as the political summit would be exceedingly important to the continued peace of the world sphere and the colonies.

Trowa could see the cracks appearing in peace treaties the world over, and he knew others weren't blind to the problem either.

It was a situation where nobody wanted to admit to there being a problem, as if denying it made it non-existent. With regular coverage from the media, tension had been building steadily and, even if they didn't say it, everyone was aware that the next conference could make or break the United Nations' agreements for good.

Glancing once more at the untroubled blue of the summer sky, Trowa returned to preparations for the breaking of the storm. For now, that was all he could do.

* * *

Heero glanced quickly up and down the deserted corridor before pressing his hand to the panel beside the door and holding his eyes wide open as a scanning ray ran past them. A computerised voice spoke to him.

"Please state name and authorisation code"

Heero spoke slowly and clearly, and then waited for the computer to process his information.

"Voice pattern confirmed. Heero Yuy. Fingerprint and retinal scan confirmed. You may now enter"

Heero glanced around again before stepping inside and the door closed with a soft sound behind him, leaving the corridor deserted once more.

* * *

Relena rubbed her hands across her eyes before resting her head in her hands and struggling not to panic. Deep, calming breaths.

The tide of paperwork was threatening to pull her under, not because there were lots of documents that required her attention but because she needed to be well informed on a multitude of issues to debate convincingly at the political summit the next week.

Relena was ready to hit her head off the desk or burst into tears in despair…everywhere she looked she saw the same thing.

Peace struggling to stop debates between countries turning into full-fledged war, military training camps being set up on the pretence of fitness facilities, scientific research patents that struggled to maintain a valid cover of peaceful applications when a slight change would render them deadly weapons of mass destruction…everything pointed towards the inevitability of another war.

And it wouldn't simply bet a war between two feuding countries, but a war that would involve the entire world nation and the colonies.

It would tear the fragile cobweb of peace treaties asunder and lead to thousands of innocent people losing their lives.

Sometimes the problems made her want to take a holiday to some deserted island where she wouldn't hear the news for a week…but that was the coward's way out and she had never taken that route.

Besides, she knew that if she ever did go on holiday she would probably end up hijacking a local radio station just to find out what was going on…her imagination would probably come up with far worse alternatives than the reality, especially with all the intelligence she had received regarding the state of the peace.

It was at times like these that she wanted someone to wrap their arms around her and tell her it was alright, just like her mother used to do when she woke screaming from yet another nightmare of burning to death.

Instead the person she usually chose to confide in was Heero.

He wasn't comforting in the slightest and he steadfastly refused to let her turn away from the harsh facts.

He never told her what she wanted to hear, but he did give her one thing she needed – the pure, unvarnished truth.

It was always a difficult thing to listen to and it was the last thing she expected to calm her worries, but talking with Heero was different.

Hearing his view reinforced her feelings that the world was spiralling towards chaos, but his factual approach made it seem more like an avoidable obstacle on their course to peace than an inescapable whirlpool.

Just being with him stopped her freefall into hysteria and made her think more rationally. Sometimes she wished he were the type of person who would just take her into his arms and provide silent sympathy, but that kind of support would probably lead to tears instead of resolutions.

And now there was his idea about the Zero system.

The thought of using the system she associated with the mobile doll troops made her slightly uneasy and the possible psychological effect it could have on Heero worried her even more.

Could a system that had been created with warlike intentions in mind possibly be used to maintain peace?

Heero thought it could so she was willing to give it a try, but she could not shift the feeling that reviving the system was a mistake.

At least Heero had agreed to keep her fully informed, a right she intended to exercise to its fullest extent. For now, she would watch and hope that they had made the right decision, but if it came to pass that the Zero system was more harm than good she would have no compunction in stopping the experiment.

And it wouldn't only be for the sake of the peace, but for the sake of Heero's sanity as well.

* * *

Heero stepped outside, the disc holding the last copy of the Zero system safely stowed in the inside pocket of his jacket.

He could feel excitement brewing in his stomach and for the first time examined his motives.

Was Wufei right? Would the Zero system actually solve anything or was his fascination with it some relic of the control it had once held over his mind?

After all he had been unable to think of anything else since that dream. Planning the system test module had taken over his every moment, waking or sleeping. After work the day before he had returned home and planned the layout of the room to the smallest detail, with the result that he had not managed much sleep but knew exactly what he needed to bring the room up to working order in even less time than he had anticipated.

The peace conference the next week would be an important turning point for all of the world and colony nations and Heero was determined that the Zero system could help them predict the outcome and perhaps help Relena steer the debates in the correct direction for peace. Her diplomatic skills, combined with an understanding of the consequences of each action taken could form a strong argument for peace.

She and Quatre had already been in touch to compare the differing complaints from the Earth and the colonies, but it was difficult to tell which direction the talks at the summit could take.

If the news and the growing number of reports building up on Relena's desk were anything to go by, things were likely to go downhill and Heero couldn't bear the thought of another war.

The only good thing about the war ending fairly recently was that people still remembered the atrocities they had seen or committed and were therefore less likely to want to fight again. However, the way the war had ended had thrown up multitudes of political factions, each trying to shape the new world to their ideal mould. And there were always going to be border disputes, power struggles and those convinced that war was the only solution to their problems.

Heero believed that the policy of complete demilitarisation was a mistake. In the short term it would work to accustom people to living in a world without weapons, but in the long term, the threat of weapons to back up the Preventer's actions would lead to peace while if they had no weapons rebel groups would have nothing to fear and it would likely end in a bloody revolution.

He thought Relena was beginning to see that possibility too, and had been opening her eyes to it from the moment she decided to give up her Peacecraft name and take the name of her more pragmatic foster father.

Her decision to allow him to reactivate the Zero system could break her career and shatter the tenuous peace…but she had still given him her permission. He still found the trust she placed in him surprising but had come to accept that she saw something in him that he couldn't even see in himself.

Besides the fact she was perfectly aware that he could do it with or without her permission.

All extraneous thought was pushed from his mind as he arrived at his chosen location for the Zero system test module.

The storage level had been unused in so many years that it didn't have an electronic lock – simply a key.

At first Heero had seen this as a problem as he didn't want any unauthorised access to the system. But in fact it would probably serve his purposes better than the tight security in the rest of the compound. This way, nobody would suspect the door concealing anything important and, if he were to fit the door with an electronic system, the door would show up on the central security computers who would log all access.

A secure room on an abandoned level and accessed only by him would look suspicious and suspicion was the last reaction he wanted.

Also, he would need to access the room out of normal office hours and lack of real security in the area would make his job a little easier.

The room was almost empty, a few desks piled in one corner, some old metal shelves and a broken office chair. Everything was covered in a thick, undisturbed layer of dust, evidence of the room's neglect.

Glancing quickly at his watch Heero began dragging the furniture about and noted power points, etc around the room on the plan he had drawn the night before. Cleaning the dust took longer, but he would have to keep the room as clean as possible as the dirt could interfere with the efficiency of the health monitors that Relena had insisted on.

One more day's work and he could have the basics connected up. The room had proved even better than he had imagined, providing him with a large number of power ports; it had obviously been used as a computer suite or something of the sort in the past.

Heero felt more involved in this experiment than he had in anything since his missions during the war.

Just a little longer and the Zero system would live once again.

* * *

Hello again! 

Horizontal lines had to be used to show breaks as this website seems to have something against large spaces between blocks of text...oh well, hope it didn't bother you too much!

I don't mind saying I've been disappointed with reviews for this story, especially as I feel my standard of writing is higher than that in Job Interview (especially the first few chapters of that fic…make me shudder!)

But a huge thank you to those who did review and I appeal to everyone to give this story a chance and let me know when you're reading. Trust me when I say that Heero x Relena fans will enjoy the later chapters (i.e. from next chapter onwards when Heero starts using the Zero system)

Individual thanks to reviewers below:

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Pureevil230 – It wasn't your threats that made me write but the fact that you cared enough to make them – thank you once again! Anyway, this fic is Heero x Relena and that will become more apparent after the next chapter…had to give more background than in Job Interview as this follows on from the series, etc. And I'm afraid the Zero system will be messing with Heero's mind…

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Oedipus Tex – Your review made me laugh…nothing like insanity to get things rolling is right! Lol Happy I've caught your interest and hope I continue to hold onto it as things are going to get more interesting!

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Sakura123- As always, thank you for reviewing! Really glad you're giving this fic a chance too as most people are just sticking to Job Interview. Happy you like Lady Une…she's quite a cool character to write. More Heero and Relena interaction in the next few chapters…I've had so much fun writing them, lol. Sorry I didn't update sooner, but next chapter will be out more quickly!

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Darkfairy88- Thanks for your support…I really wish more people would review as well- there's nothing like a review to make you write faster, lol. I'm beginning to think everyone is just waiting for the next Job Interview chapter so this one is a disappointment – hoping for an update from the other fic in their inbox instead, lol Hope you like this chapter too!

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Nubia – I will continue to write and hopefully you will continue reading as well! Hope to see you again soon!

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Once again, I cannot thank you enough for your reviews or beg you enough to please review this chapter (I really enjoy writing this story so I won't give it up but I have to admit that it's discouraging not to get much feedback…though that I have received has been brilliant so thank you very much!) 

Okay, I'm off but will see you again soon for Chapter 12 of Job Interview and a little later for Chapter 4 of this fanfic.

Thanks! Please click below and review! (Even if it's just to say hello!)

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	4. The Beginning

Hello everyone and welcome back for yet another update from me – I'm on a roll, yeah! This fic was put on the backburner for a while due to the much greater demand for updates to Job Interview. However, I really enjoy writing this fic so I going to continue updating it. Hope everyone out there enjoys it too! Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed so far – I really appreciate the feedback!!

Summary so far: (since it's been a while) Heero has been having odd dreams to do with the war and, in particular, the Zero System. When he discovers that Duo has been experimenting with building a new mobile suit from spare parts he has found while doing salvage work he realises that he's not the only one finding it difficult to let go of the past.

He comes up with the idea of using the Zero system to look at alternative paths of action and their consequences; something that he's hoping will assist Relena and the Preventors in maintaining peace. Surprisingly, Relena agress to it despite her committment to avoiding war-like actions. However, due to the increasinly-unstable political climate, this experiment has to be carried out in utmost secrecy. Some already doubt the wisdom in reviving the Zero system but Heero is driven to see his experiment through.

Relena rubbed her hands across her eyes tiredly then glanced at her watch. Almost lunchtime...now she just had to get away. She called her secretary who reassured her that she could take a lunch break until a scheduled video conference at 2.30pm, then took out her mobile phone and sent Heero a simple message.

"Are you ready?"

It seemed stupid to be so cautious in a private message between the two of them but Heero had warned her about messages being intercepted. The reply came almost immediately.

"Level 0 Cafeteria. 5 minutes"

Relena gathered her things and left her office at an unhurried pace though her heart was going a mile a minute. Heero had succeeded in completing the fitting of the test module in record time. If all went to plan he would be conducting the initial tests with the Zero system later that day. The thought excited yet worried Relena...if Heero were right the system could prove to be invaluable to prolonging the peace...but the psychological strain placed upon Heero himself could be formidable.

She tried not to glance at her watch again as she was waylaid by a co-worker; it wouldn't do to show impatience. Relena smiled and nodded in all the right places but her mind was a million miles away. If anyone had asked her what the woman had said Relena would have drawn a blank. Eventually she managed to disengage herself and continued her journey, hoping that her politician's mask would be sufficient to disguise the excitement bubbling in her stomach. She barely avoided sighing out loud whenever she caught sight of yet another co-worker who she couldn't avoid. It wouldn't do to seem in a hurry; after all she was officially on lunch break. By the time she made it to the cafeteria Heero was a welcome sight. He was like a pool of calm among the bustle of masses of people rushing from a to b, each intent on their own errands. He sat off to one side, casually sipping at a carton of apple juice. Relena envied him his calm; very little ever seemed to fluster him. She slid onto the bench across the table from him and leaned forward eagerly.

"How is it?"

She didn't have to worry about being overheard – the tables on either side of them were empty and the noise in the cafeteria was more than enough to mask an individual conversation.

"Preliminary tests show no problems. I will run the first full test this afternoon."

"Can I be there Heero?"

He seemed surprised at her question, though Relena imagined that he would have anticipated it.

Heero hesitated. He could see why Relena would want to be there; after all she was the one with the most to lose or gain from his project. Also, she had witnessed its use during the war so was perhaps more aware the others of the psychological effects on the users. There was no logical reason for him to prevent her being there but...he didn't want her to. It was as simple as that. He didn't want her to witness the state he would be in after the Zero System had torn into his consciousness. He didn't want to put her at risk by putting her in close proximity to himself while in a mentally unstable state. It had taken him a long time to reconcile himself with simply meeting with her when he was thinking normally without seeing assassins in every shadow.

Relena was still waiting patiently for his reply, her blue eyes bright with emotions he couldn't read...or didn't choose to. It would be dangerous for him to acknowledge some of the things he could see in her eyes...dangerous for both of them.

She watched Heero's consideration carefully, trying to follow his train of thoughts by the minuscule changes in his body language. They would be invisible to anyone but someone like her who had watched him for years. She had made a study of Heero Yuy and all his peculiarities and, while she would never presume to know what he was thinking, she could make an educated guess.

Heero looked up, "You can watch from the observation module. It might not be...safe to have you in the room."

Relena didn't argue or ask him for his reasons. If he didn't volunteer them, asking would get her no answers.

He stood abruptly, "Follow me"

They walked a roundabout route so as to confuse anyone following and the security cameras. Finally Heero opened an old fire-escape door and they descended a flight of stairs to the basement. Relena noted the lack of security cameras.

"Isn't this a security risk?"

"It would be...if myself and Wufei didn't know about it"

Relena nodded and remained silent for the remainder of the descent. She liked the way Heero answered her questions even if they probably seemed silly to him. He never treated her as if she were stupid or weak, even after the number of times he had protected her. And she could always rely on his answers to be honest. However, he wouldn't volunteer information until she asked the right questions; he preferred to guide her along the correct lines rather than hand her the data on a plate. It was sometimes frustrating but always interesting.

Relena tried not to make her interest too obvious as Heero showed her around the room. The door opened with an ordinary key but she had no doubt that he had passwords in place upon the computer systems involved to ensure no unauthorized access. She didn't want Heero to guess the seeds of an idea which had taken root inside her head, but she watched carefully as he disabled the security systems around the room. The observation module was the equivalent of what must have been the technician's office during the room's former role as a computer suite. It was set up with a computer that would show the statistics from each of the health monitors, as well as a window overlooking the chair where the person using Zero would be seated. Relena couldn't help it – she was curious. This system was so powerful and so dangerous that the very mention of the software had been forbidden. And here she was in a room with the last remaining copy and one of the only people ever to master it. What had Heero and her brother seen while using it?

She ran her hand along the arm of the pilot's seat, beginning to wonder how it would have felt to sit there during a combat situation...

Relena looked up guiltily as Heero turned towards her.

"Relena, I..." he led her into the observation module, "I want you to stay in here for the duration of the test. Even if...anything out of the ordinary should happen."

He seemed to be choosing his words very carefully. Relena opened her mouth to protest, but Heero cut her off.

"My behaviour while under the influence of the Zero system may be erratic but it isn't safe for you to interfere."

He moved back into the main part of the room, closing the door firmly behind him and fighting the urge to lock it as well. The more he thought about it the more unhappy he was about letting Relena witness the first tests. He was weaker now than he had been when he had first encountered the system. Heero knew how easily the system could find and exploit any chinks in one's emotional armour...and he had so many more possible areas of exploitation now than he had during the war. When the war had started he had been trained up until that moment to be a soldier, by one of the people who had created Zero in the first place and even then the system had found weaknesses.

He didn't want to admit it to Relena but he was worried; would he be the best person to use the Zero system or would he be unable to see clearly through eyes clouded by guilt and uncertainty? Would the images that haunted his nightmares every night be used against him by the system?

He glanced through the window and almost, but not quite, mustered a smile. She would know there was something wrong if he tried too hard.

Relena watched Heero as he moved around the room making the final preparations, growing steadily more anxious. There was no logical explanation for her fears but she was afraid. The system seemed almost malignant.

The slight smile from Heero reminded her of the night on Libra when he had left to fight her brother, the look in his eyes...the words he had said then rang in her head and Relena fought an inexplicable urge to stop things before they could go any further. This wasn't right...the war was over and Zero was dead just like it should be. She took a breath to speak, then stopped as Heero turned to face her once more. There were so many things in his eyes, too many for her to understand them all at once but she knew that he was determined to see his experiment through. He had fought for peace every bit as much as her and, like her, he would continue fighting until his last breath. Zero could be the only thing standing between them and maintaining that peace.

She sat down heavily in the chair and gave Heero a nod. She had known for a long time that there was no chance of either of them leading a normal life and this was just the latest thing among many that they had to do.

Heero watched her take a seat and returned her nod before turning away to face the Zero System. His heart was pounding with a mixture of anticipation and dread so he called upon his training to bring his body back to normal before strapping himself in and activating the health monitors. Despite the long break, his skills had never truly left him and his body reacted quickly.

Relena's voice came through the intercom clearly.

"Everything seems to be working fine. All readings normal"

Heero caught her eyes through the glass. Someone needed to be here for the tests but he still wasn't sure if Relena were the best person...he never wanted her to see him in a state like that he had been in after his first encounter with the system.

Relena watched, her heart in her throat as Heero caught her eye for one last time before turning back to the screen in front of him and activating the system. Anything could happen now.

Heero stared at the screen in front of him flashing, 'Zero' for a second before the room around him began to fade. Then Zero took hold of his brain and he lost all track of all rational thought.

Relena bent forward to see more clearly as Heero's eyes opened wide and his body strained against the restraints. It was obvious that he was seeing things that weren't in the room with them. The charts started to fluctuate and she watched nervously as his brainwaves began to spike unnaturally. What could she do if this experiment went wrong? Wouldn't it be even more dangerous for Heero if she cut off the power? Relena's fingers dug into the arms of her chair as she watched Heero's body stiffen as if he were in pain. She had to trust him.

Heero screamed soundlessly as the world disintegrated around him and his brain was pummelled with information too quickly for him to register anything. He caught sight of Relena's face and hooked onto it, anchoring his consciousness around that tiny point of stability. It was strange; he could feel the armrests of the chair as his fingers dug into them but when he looked down at his body he could see himself floating in a dark, empty space. Was he inside his own mind? Or was it a hallucination induced by the Zero system?

He could tell that it was a mistake to focus on Relena's face almost as soon as he did it. The Zero system had never failed to take advantage of his weakness towards her in the past and he was sure that it would have no hesitation in doing so again.

She was standing in the sight of his beam rifle and turned slowly to look at him as he pulled the trigger...Heero tore his mind away forcefully and tried to think of anything but Relena. He would not watch her die by his hands again. He already saw that every night in his nightmares.

Heero felt a faint sense of panic as memories he had locked away began to flood back to him. He could feel the overwhelming presence of the Zero system pressing in upon him malevolently. The Zero system had never just been another operating system – it had always had a kind of awareness, almost a consciousness of its own.

Suddenly he was standing on the supplies deck of a large spaceship. It reminded him of Libra but a few seconds of observation reassured him that it was not. Wherever he was it wasn't trapped inside an old memory.

The lighting was oddly dim and Heero strained his eyes into the shadows at his feet. A man lay there, a pool of blood spreading out steadily around him. Heero stepped back, wary, and unwilling to let the pool of blood lap at his toes. The man had no unusual features that could have served as identification. Heero knelt quickly to check for signs of life but he knew already that he would find none. The pool of blood spread further and Heero stepped back once again, unease growing in the pit of his stomach. So many things about this scene were ringing untrue that his intuition was screaming at him to get out. He stepped back again and felt his back come up against the cool metal wall. There was so much blood...how could the human body hold so much blood? It was black in the semi-darkness and he began to doubt his own eyes – was it really blood after all? As he bent closer, the flood beneath him rocked and he was thrown to one side by a nearby explosion. It lit up the scene in shocking colour, leaving no doubt that it was blood spreading across the corridor floor. Heero landed neatly, instincts taking over and shook his head to relieve the ringing in his ears. But there was no ringing, in fact there was no sound at all nor had there been since he entered the vision. There was another flash of light from the end of the corridor but this time he felt no accompanying shock wave. In the flash the entire area was lit up and he could see blood dripping from every surface...his back came away from the wall slick with blood. He closed his eyes slowly and willed the scene to change.

When he opened them again he was the observation deck of yet another ship...or at least he assumed it was. It disturbed him that he couldn't identify the ships he was on, particularly because the Preventors kept a tight hold upon who could manufacture or own a spaceship. If a warship like the one he had originally found himself on did exist, things were already more advanced towards war than he had feared.

He glanced around the observation deck, pausing as his eyes lighted upon Relena. She had her back to him and was gesturing wildly as she appeared to argue with someone in front of her. Heero strained his eyes again but he couldn't see who she was speaking to, or hear any of what was being said. Light caught on a ring sparkling on her left hand...on her ring finger and Heero's interest sharpened. Was Zero showing him possible futures? Heero watched as Relena turned and ran past him out of the room, tears pouring down her cheeks. She passed so close to him that he could have reached out and touched her if he had so desired. As she passed him he turned and felt his foot catch on a step that didn't exist. But before he could rationalise his response he was falling. He landed heavily, his head colliding with the ground and everything dissolved into unconsciousness.

Heero woke with his face pressed against the control panel of Wing Gundam. Several of the sensors were beeping loudly to warn him that he was in a combat zone. He appraised the situation quickly and set to work. Unlike in his dream, the Gundam reacted just like it should. Heero felt a wild joy surge up inside him and he laughed as he dispatched the last few mobile dolls around him. He hadn't felt so complete in years...he and Wing were the perfect team! He was rocked forward in his seat as a shot connected with the back of Wing. He turned to fight but already his vision was disintegrating into whirls of colour. He felt the loss of his Gundam once again as sharply as though it were a physical separation of one of his limbs. The malevolent presence he had recognized as Zero retreated and Heero slumped forward into unconsciousness once again.

Relena was so tense watching the test that she was barely resting on her seat at all. Several times she started up, determined to step in and stop the experiment but Heero's warning was fresh in her mind. It might not be safe for either of them if the test were aborted early. She glanced at the timer on the screen to her right, willing it to go more quickly. For the initial test Heero had set a timer, after which the system would automatically power down. It was designed so that he would have an idea of how long had passed in the real world while he was using Zero and, in this case, so that he could work out the optimum length of exposure for information gathering and sanity preserving purposes. Relena jumped as Heero's laughter filled the test module; it was maniacal and cruel, owing nothing to mirth. She shivered slightly and glanced pleadingly at the clock once again...not long to go now. The brainwave monitor began to beep dangerously as the patterns displayed spiked more violently and Relena wrung her hands together feeling more helpless than she had in years. What could she do to help? When the system powered down she froze for a second watching Heero. But he didn't move. Relena shot from her seat and tore the door of the observation room open, slamming it against the wall in her haste. Was Heero okay?

He heart in her throat she closed the distance between them and knelt beside him. She could work out his physical condition as the health monitors slowly began to return to normal. But mentally was a whole other question.

"Heero? Heero, can you hear me?"

She gently unfurled his fingers from the armrests they were gripping and placed he hand against his forehead to tilt his head back so she could look at his face. It seemed as if he were sleeping but Relena was worried that his unconsciousness could be a result of mental trauma. Should she get a doctor? But how would she explain his condition? Maybe this whole idea had been a mistake. When Heero had initially brought it up he first instinct was to refuse...but his arguments had a point and Relena would entertain almost any idea if it would maintain peace.

She stood, running through options in her head. The only doctor within the Preventors that she knew personally was Sally and she had proved time and time again that she was a trustworthy ally. It was dangerous to let anyone else in on their secret but Heero's health had to come first. She wouldn't risk losing him.

As Relena turned to leaved Heero groaned and she spun towards him.

"Heero! Are you okay?"

Heero looked up slowly, his head splitting as if someone had hit him. For a moment he was confused about where he was, then the details of the room and Relena's concerned face swam into focus.

"Relena?" Her name was a question, but he soon remembered exactly why she was there...why they were both in a deserted storage room in Preventor headquarters. Heero looked at the computer system in front of him consideringly. He knew that he hadn't imagined the intense malevolence from the Zero system but he couldn't understand why he had regained consciousness with a splitting headache. That probably wasn't a good sign.

He was taken aback as Relena flung her arms round him.

"Thank goodness!"

She let go quickly, looking embarrassed, "I'm sorry...but I was worried about you"

He nodded, acknowledging her concern then pushed himself to his feet. He could feel Relena's eyes on him and tried not to let her see the fatigue seeping through his muscles. He retreated into the observation module and began typing up what he had seen. Things that might have seemed insignificant at the time could have an importance later.

Relena watched Heero's back disappear into the other part of the room and concentrated on bringing her breathing back to a normal rate and cooling her hot cheeks. She didn't know what had possessed her to hug Heero...anyone would agree that he was just about the most un-huggable person out there! But after what she had seen she had been concerned. If Heero was unharmed now she had no reason to stop the tests, but a nagging feeling in her gut made he doubt the wisdom of continuing them. What if something did happen whenever nobody was there to get Heero help?

She could hear him typing from the other room and jumped when he spoke.

"It's getting late. Don't you need to get back?"

"Heero, I...", she stopped and sighed, "You're right"

She gathered up her things, trying not to let Heero's dismissal affect her. She had known from the start that he didn't want her to be a direct witness or even have much involvement with his project beyond the necessary. But she knew him too well to imagine that he would take proper care of his health.

Relena paused at the door, "Be careful"

Heero didn't bother to reply, his mind still caught up in a re-enactment of the events he had witnessed through the Zero System. But he did look up at the shaft of sunlight that pierced the room whenever she opened the door. And, though he would never have admitted it, he did feel some small regret when both Relena and the sunlight were gone leaving him alone in the shadows. Still that was the way it had always been, the way it would always be...the way it should be.

Thank you for reading and please review!!

Individual thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter below:

Pureevil230 – Sorry for the massive delay but I promise to update regularly from now on...no more breaks like this one!! Thank you for reading and hope you still enjoy it!!!

charlie00 – I feel really guilty for not updating this fic for so long now....especially as I already have the majority of it written and it just needs typing up and editing!! Really happy you liked it and hope that you will still like it after such a long time without an update!! Oh and the chapters for this fic should remain about this length most of the way through!

Reignashii – Hope you will continue reading...I'm really looking forward to getting stuck into this story!!

Stardust Angel2 – Glad you liked it and hope you keep reading!!

IchigoKitsuneKoumori – Yup, using the Zero system is an idea that I imagine only Heero would have even entertained, let alone followed through with...just got to wait and see what happens!

Sakura123- wow, has been a long time since I updated...i feel bad now! But I wanted to say thank you for reviewing and am hoping to update soon!

Mini Nicka – Glad you liked it!

Melpomene Rose – Happy you liked it though i now feel even more guilty for not having updated in ages! I'm looking forward to updating more often, especially as I'm really enjoying writing within the original universe rather than just AU. Glad you liked Lady Une too!

Raksha – Sorry that the update didn't materialize any sooner than this...but I will be continuing! Hope you keep reading!

Once again, thank you to everyone for reading (and hopefully reviewing!lol) and I'm looking forward to seeing you soon! Next update should be in about 2 weeks!!


	5. Cracks

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Hi again everyone!

I'm back with another update (please don't kill me that it's not for "Job Interview" as I am working on the next chapter of that as well. I will be writing a fair bit this weekend but I can't guarantee that there will be an update before next weekend as I have exams coming up and they're going to be tough!

Anyway, I just want to say thank you to anyone that has made it this far – thank you for reading and I would really appreciate any feedback that you can give me. Despite Job Interview being the most popular of my stories, this is my vision of what could have happened after the series ended and as such i feel that it is closer to the true characters (or at least i hope so!)

On to the story – enjoy!

* * *

Aftermath – events so far

The Eve Wars are over and the Gundam pilots are struggling to live in the tenuous peace that has resulted. A civilian life seeming impossible, they end up working with the Preventors and Relena in trying to hold the peace together, despite the numerous political groups and former military factions trying to reshape the new world in their own image.

All of the pilots suffer from nightmares of the things they saw and did during wartime and they each react in different ways in trying to deal with the aftermath of their experiences.

Heero and Relena are both pouring everything into holding the peace together with Relena acting as the world's symbol of peace while Heero works behind the scenes within Preventors alongside Trowa and Wufei. Wufei is now in charge of the Preventors internal security and seems to be dealing the best with a new life. Trowa had returned to engineering, satisfied to be a small part of the Preventors machine unless called upon to do otherwise.

Duo lives with Hilde who has cut herself off from the military world completely, instead running a small scrap business which Duo helps her out with whenever he isn't required by the Preventors. As a method of stress-relief Duo begins tinkering with some of the scrap in their yard, missing his Gundam so much that he begins to construct a mobile suit. The possible consequences of his actions don't occur to him until Hilde finds out what he has been doing. At the beginning of the story he admits what has happened to Heero, triggering a sequence of events which results in Heero reaching the conclusion that something more has to be done to preserve the peace, namely resurrecting the Zero system and using it as a way to predict and prepare for possible revolutions.

Despite the reservations of the people surrounding him Heero succeeds in reviving the system, but he's having a hard time mastering a system that takes advantage of every chink in his emotional armour.

This chapter focuses on Duo and Hilde and the issues surrounding Duo's reconstruction of a mobile suit.

* * *

"Hil? You in?"

Duo chucked his keys on the counter carelessly and pulled his cap off to hang it on a peg by the door. He frowned. The house was dark and he fought off the unease that besieged him when he heard no reply from his housemate.

"Hilde?" He raised his voice a little more, already looking for signs that anything out of the ordinary had happened. Old habits died hard and they had not yet been living in peace for enough years for him to have forgotten his training.

His hand went to the holster at his hip, but he restrained the urge the draw the gun. Hilde had once been a soldier too, but it didn't mean that she was happy to come up against a gun in her own house. She had given up asking him to take it off when he came in, knowing that he would fidget nervously, every sound driving his hand to his hip with the force of habit. A split second could make the difference between living and dying in a fight and Duo's training was so ingrained into his psyche that he was unable to relax unless he had a weapon within reach. It was unhealthy and Duo knew it, but he could never forget how quickly he had lost everything that was important to him and how different it might have been if he had been able to fight.

Hilde understood; she too had been helpless to do anything when her family was killed. Joining Oz had been her way of ensuring that she would never be helpless again, but after what she had seen in the war she believed that Relena's ideal of a weapon-free world was their only option.

Duo didn't press her on that point; she knew as well as he did that peace without weapons was an impossibility but she wanted to believe that it could happen. She was just like himself, the other Gundam pilots and any other soldier who had seen enough of the conflict to realise how pointless it was; they didn't want to fight anymore. The world had seen enough pain so even if a perfect peace was an unattainable dream it wasn't fair to take that dream away from them.

Relena knew the hopeless battle she was fighting but she had never considered giving it up. She fought so hard that Duo sometimes found himself believing that she could do it, despite all he knew to the contrary.

His fingers caressed the hilt of his gun as he rounded the corner into the kitchen. Still no sign of Hilde, but there was an abandoned mug of hot chocolate on the kitchen table, the steam rising from it still visible in the faint light from the window.

Duo moved through the room soundlessly and exited into the hall on the other side. He could hear nobody but himself in the house. He had been living with Hilde for so long now that he could pick out the patterns in her movement and her breathing; follow the flickering of emotions across her face and know how much she left unsaid. A sound outside drew his attention and he pulled the hem of his jacket over the hilt of the gun before grabbing the hot chocolate off the table and stepping outside.

Since Hilde's discovery of his "stress-relieving" project he felt as if they were on shaky ground with each other. She had placed trust in him beyond what he deserved, almost from their very first meeting and she had accepted his odd paranoid habits even when she didn't like them. Duo didn't even know what had possessed him; he hadn't set out to build a mobile suit, much as he missed his Gundam. It had almost been unconscious, something to distract him from the inevitability of another war.

Hilde stood with her back to the house, her face expressionless as she watched an unmarked truck reverse up the drive. Duo handed her the mug and she curled her fingers around it to combat the sharp drop in temperature that came with the sun setting.

"They're here to pick it up"

Duo had moved up to stand beside her and he looked across sharply.

Hilde met his eyes and clarified, "Your little project"

Duo held her gaze for a second longer searching for anything that would give away how she was feeling. It unnerved him to see her so blank, to see the mask she had created to hide her emotions behind when she killed during the war. It made him want to shake her and make her bring back the woman he knew. Even anger would be better than the carefully constructed neutrality she was presenting him with now.

Duo took a cautious step towards her, "Hilde..."

There was a flash of...something and she stepped back away from him before spinning on her heel to go inside.

"I don't feel like cooking tonight so I'm going to order a takeaway. Ask those two if they want anything"

Duo was still watching as the door slammed shut slightly harder than was necessary then he let out a frustrated sigh and pushed his hair back from his face. Somehow he would make things right...and the first step was waiting for him.

* * *

Trowa and Wufei were both already examining what he had built when he arrived. He had known it would be them – who else could be trusted with the secret? Still he felt a flare of protectiveness as Wufei stepped closer to look at the work on one hand.

Trowa spoke without looking at him, Very impressive"

Wufei shook his head as he turned towards them, "If this is what you could do with a bunch of scrap we've got to worry about what's being done elsewhere"

He looked at Duo closely, "No other projects we should know about while we're here?"

Duo shook his head with an effort. He knew that Gundams could not be allowed to exist if they wished for peace, but the thought of his project being turned into scrap once again was harder to swallow than he had anticipated.

"Does it work?" Trowa had approached the suit again, his curiosity getting the best of him.

Duo nodded, "As much as it could be expected to at this stage"

"Live ammo?"

Wufei's question was quiet and Duo dropped his eyes before nodding tightly. He could feel the eyes of his fellow Gundam pilots on him and he shifted under the uncomfortable scrutiny.

"It's not loaded, but it could handle it"

Perversely he felt a frisson of pride that was answered when Trowa and Wufei began to fire off different questions about the suit's capabilities. The conversation became animated and for a few minutes it was as if they were fifteen again and preparing to battle for the colonies. Trowa was the first to catch himself and the conversation trailed off into an awkward silence.

Surprisingly, Trowa was the first to break it.

"You're not the only one who misses your Gundam"

Wufei closed his eyes and hissed through his teeth as if he were in pain, and Duo couldn't bring himself to make any reply to Trowa's bald statement. He thought of Hilde and the pain thousands of people were still bearing because of war. He thought of the endless cycle of death and destruction and how easy it would be to tumble back into it. Slowly he dragged himself back to reality.

Wufei's hand fell heavily on his shoulder in an uncharacteristic show of sympathy.

"It's a shame but we'll do what needs to be done"

Duo forced a smile, "At least this time we're all on the same side"

Without further ado, they began to load the parts onto the back of the truck, their respectful silence saying more than any words could.

* * *

By the time Duo stepped back inside it was already late.

The house was dark, his Chinese takeaway neatly stacked on the kitchen table and long since cold. Hilde had obviously already eaten, the spicy smell still hanging in the air despite her plate and chopsticks already having been washed up. Duo sighed and debated heating up the food but he couldn't muster an appetite. Not so long ago Hilde would have come outside and dragged him in to eat, or, even better, brought all of it outside and eaten next to him, her body a long line of warmth down one side of his own. All that had changed when she had found what he had been working on and now she seemed like a ghost simply floating through her daily routine.

They hadn't properly spoken since their argument and Duo wasn't sure how much more he could handle of having Hilde avoid him.

Her bedroom door was closed tightly, a sure sign that she didn't want to be disturbed. Usually it lay ajar even when she was changing as she trusted Duo to knock. Duo paused and laid his forehead against the smooth grain of the wood, listening to Hilde breathing just a few feet away. He wasn't going to let it go on for any longer.

Duo pushed down gently on the door handle and slid the door open quietly, before padding across the carpet and perching on the edge of Hilde's bed, the mattress sinking slightly below his weight.

She knew he was there, he could tell from her breathing that she wasn't asleep but she didn't speak. Duo let out a deep breath; it was okay. He didn't need her to speak to him just yet as long as she would listen to him. In a way it might be easier to drop his mask and tell her the truth if he could do it in the dark, without having to watch the inevitable questions in her eyes.

It was hard to begin, but he swallowed and forced the words out.

"Hilde. I know you've heard all you want to hear from me about this already but I want to apologize again. I'm sorry. I was too much of an idiot to see what I was doing." A faint edge of venom crept into his voice, aimed at himself.

"I'm pathetic, a soldier who can't accept that his war is over. If nothing else this whole fiasco has made me see that."

He paused, "I want a future Hil. I want to be able to live in the peace I helped to create. I want to be able to stop carrying a gun, knowing that the people important to me will be safe without it."

His voice became even quieter, "Maybe I can't right now...but someday...I will. On that someday I want you to be with me...so I'll do anything to show you I can be trusted again"

For a second it seemed as if they had both stopped breathing and the room was silent. Hilde turned in the bed and Duo imagined her reaching her hand towards him but she stopped before they touched. He stood, refusing to glance back because he knew that he wouldn't be able to leave if he saw her tears.

"Goodnight Hilde"

He felt her nod rather than saw it, could hear the tears in her voice when she spoke but she didn't call him back, "Night Duo"

He stood outside her door, fists clenched as he listened to her crying. She was only a few feet away but it may as well have been miles for all of the difference it made. Eventually she became quieter, her breathing slowing as she slipped into sleep and Duo relaxed his stance before moving down the hall and shutting himself in his own room. His mask was in tatters and he knew that he wouldn't sleep. Instead he would do something...anything to make right what he had done wrong.

* * *

Hilde woke with a strange feeling of displacement as if something were wrong but she couldn't put her finger on what exactly it was. She lay still for a moment, going over the events of the past week in her head.

At first she hadn't been able to believe her eyes when she had found Duo's project...it was unmistakeably a mobile suit but what she thought she knew kept on interfering with what she was seeing. She couldn't believe that it could be a mobile suit, let alone a Gundam. With the peace in such a delicate condition, something like that suit would be enough to push it over the edge and throw them all back into the hellish turmoil of war.

She hadn't thought...she was just furious. How could Duo risk peace when he had spent most of his life fighting for it? She knew that he wasn't adjusting well to living in peace, she had known that he hadn't intended any harm with his tinkering...she had known it all even before she saw the shocked widening of his eyes as she yelled at him. She should have been more observant, she should have tried harder to make sure that he was kept busy and away from his brooding thoughts about war.

Hilde sighed, an angry exhalation of breath, and threw the covers back, baring her skin to the cold morning air. Once in the bathroom she scrubbed all traces of the last nights tears from her cheeks and stared at her reflection in the mirror, looking for the strength that had made her fight for survival after her family was killed. She needed that strength and so did Duo, if his words from the previous night were anything to go by. He didn't let his façade drop very often and it made Hilde's heart ache every time he did so she had to become the support he had been for her in the last days of the war.

She dressed quickly and knocked on his door before opening it to find the bed empty and unslept in. Hilde found him in the yard, already soaked in sweat as he moved various parts into an order that only made sense to him.

"Duo. What's wrong?"

He turned to face her as she approached and Hilde was taken aback by the desperation burning in his eyes.

"I have to get rid of all of it"

He turned and went back to his work, only pausing again when Hilde touched him on the shoulder, "What do you mean?"

"I have to get rid of all of it", he repeated, "Anything and everything that could tempt me again"

Hilde looked around and the piles began to make sense. He was gathering up anything that had come from a mobile suit or that could be used in their manufacture, but he was being more thorough than she thought he needed to be. She frowned, "But Duo, some of this stuff can be used for other things too."

He shook his head without even bothering to look in her direction, "It doesn't matter. Its safer melted down"

Hilde nodded behind his back and pulled her work gloves on. Without another word she set to work, shoulder to shoulder with her most important person. If it was for Duo she would do anything she could to help.

* * *

"And why should we listen to someone who has no knowledge of politics? Why should we take the advice of someone who has gained her position because of who her parents were?"

Relena resisted the urge to knead her temples to chase away the headache that had been her constant companion since the night before. Taking a deep breath she prepared to argue an issue that she had already dealt with on numerous occasions.

"Honourable Speaker, I must interrupt."

She stood to gain the attention of the other politicians, " I may not have a university degree qualifying me in all matters political but I do have one very important thing. It is the same thing that everyone else in this world has – experience. The experience of seeing what war can do and the desire to never see it again.

But, unlike many, I am in a position where I can do something to prevent such a war ever breaking out again. Do you blame me for using my influence, however it may have been obtained?

I am well aware that there are many who would rather I stepped down from my position as Foreign Minister. But I am also aware of the public who wish me to remain in power. Even if that wish has nothing to do with my own qualities but rather what the Peacecraft family symbolised, I will not stand down. The people need a symbol of peace and I will be what they need. However, I refuse to be a dumb figurehead who will idly stand by while preparations for war are made by the very people who should be upholding peace!"

The chamber descended into uproar as Relena took her seat once again, her cheeks flushed with righteous indignation. She had been working on holding her tongue more during official meetings but it made her blood boil to sit in the same chamber as a number of men who she knew were planning to overthrow the peace.

Some within the Preventors saw it as stupidity to make them aware of the fact that she knew something, but she simply saw it as a warning which might make them reconsider their actions. She knew Heero would disagree, use it as yet another example of how she placed too much trust in the good nature of human beings. She could already imagine Une's complaint that she had once again made the job of protecting her a more difficult one but it all seemed unimportant when pleace next to the bigger picture.

Relena stopped her train of thought and tuned back into what the speaker was saying. She would worry about her job first, then her life.

* * *

Heero slipped his headphones off and sighed. He could see anger reflected in many faces in the chamber, but their voices were now blessedly muted.

Relena had always spoken her mind and time in politics hadn't changed that. It was an admirable quality, one that gained her public support. The people saw a politician with real heart, not someone who was in it for the money or to increase their own power. But it wasn't Relena's supporters that Heero worried about...it was her enemies. And as the political situation grew ever more delicate it seemed that there were more enemies appearing everyday.

He frowned as he looked around the chamber; according to their intelligence operations more than half of the people there were involved in their own bids for power or at least activities that appeared suspicious. What remained to be seen, however, was if and when any of their plans would be initiated. Not only Relena's life, but the peace they had fought so hard for could be at stake.

Heero consciously forced his hands to relax, as they had curled into fists as he listened to Relena making more enemies. He couldn't be with her every minute of everyday to make sure that she would be safe and he knew that advising caution in her speeches would make no difference. Relena was already too big a target; both the symbol of the fragile peace and the glue that held it together. Her disappearance had led to the Eve Wars and her death would be the obvious distraction for anyone hoping to throw the world back into chaos and reshape it as they saw fit. He knew that she saw the threat too, but she wouldn't let even the threats on her own life stand between her and peace.

Heero watched Relena on the screen for another long minute before shutting the computer down and sealing her image away in a corner of his brain for safekeeping.

He wouldn't let the Zero system continue using her against him; instead he would master the system once more and make it show him what he needed to keep her safe. Without her neither he nor the world could be at peace.

* * *

Hi again everyone and thanks for reading Please leave me a review and let me know what you think of the story as I would love to get some feedback– a massive thank you has to go to Ichikokitsunekoumori and Player Zero for reviewing my last chapter! Thank you – i really appreciate it!

The next chapter of this fic has already been drafted so I will be editing and polishing this weekend. I am also working on the second draft of the next chapter of Job Interview so keep an eye out for that too!

Thanks again for reading and hope to see you again soon!

* * *


	6. Constancy

* * *

Author's note: Sorry for the long delay as always but I promise further updates will be coming more regularly! The following scene was one of the first I wrote in full for Aftermath and, despite many editings, it has remained remarkably close to the original. Hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think!

* * *

Aftermath – events so far

The Eve Wars are over and the Gundam pilots are struggling to live in the tenuous peace that has resulted. A civilian life seeming impossible, they end up working with the Preventors and Relena in trying to hold the peace together, despite the numerous political groups and former military factions trying to reshape the new world in their own image.

All of the pilots suffer from nightmares of the things they saw and did during wartime and they each react in different ways in trying to deal with the aftermath of their experiences.

Heero and Relena are both pouring everything into holding the peace together with Relena acting as the world's symbol of peace while Heero works behind the scenes within Preventors alongside Trowa and Wufei. Wufei is now in charge of the Preventors internal security and seems to be dealing the best with a new life. Trowa has returned to engineering, satisfied to be a small part of the Preventors machine unless called upon to do otherwise.

Duo works with the Preventors as a simple operative although this is usually a cover for his more dangerous assignments. He lives with Hilde who has cut herself off from the military world completely, instead running a small scrap business which Duo helps her out with whenever he isn't required by the Preventors. As a method of stress-relief Duo begins tinkering with some of the scrap in their yard, missing his Gundam so much that he begins to construct a mobile suit. The possible consequences of his actions don't occur to him until Hilde finds out what he has been doing. At the beginning of the story he admits what has happened to Heero, triggering a sequence of events which results in Heero reaching the conclusion that something more has to be done to preserve the peace, namely resurrecting the Zero system and using it as a way to predict and prepare for possible revolutions.

Despite the reservations of the people surrounding him Heero succeeds in reviving the system, but is having a hard time mastering a system that takes advantage of every chink in his emotional armour. There are cracks appearing in the hard-won peace everywhere and both he and Relena are feeling a sense of urgency as if war could once again overtake the world. They push the boundaries of the human body and mind in their respective battle arenas and events begin to accelerate. This chapter focuses on the one thing that is constant for them both in a changing world.

* * *

****************************************************************

* * *

Aftermath: Constancy

* * *

They were standing in a room so huge that he couldn't see the walls...or maybe they were just bleached out by the brilliance of the light before them.

Heero could feel the reassuring solidity of the wall behind him and knew that he and Duo, who was standing just to his left, had only a moment before come through an ordinary door, the door to the Zero lab.

Relena was slumped on the floor in front of him, surrounded by a dazzling dome of light. Her skin glowed as if she were the source of the light, her hair glowing gold in a crackling haze around her head. From this distance it appeared as if her shoulders were shaking, but her hair hid any expression.

Heero took a step forward and the hairs on his arms pulled his skin as they stood on end; he could feel the unmistakable prickle of electricity as he tried to smooth them. The entire situation felt as if it were building up to something, the tension singing through the air.

Heero tried to step forward again but the light was like a pane of glass through which he could not pass. He moved, automatically searching for an entrance, moving systematically through all possible options as the tension rose even higher. A muffled exclamation from Duo brought his attention back to the centre of the tension, Relena.

His eyes widened as he saw what had caught Duo's attention. Relena's body was lifting slowly off the ground, her back arched and her head lolling uncomfortably...was she unconscious? Irrationally Heero thought of a fallen angel and for a second he was almost able to see the bloody wounds on her back where her wings had been torn off before she had been flung to earth.

The light became thicker as if the room were flooded with a golden liquid. Heero felt his body relax as if into the support of water and his mind began to drift away from his body...as if he were looking down on the entire scene from above. Thoughts no longer commanded limbs, no longer connected to anywhere...a warm sense of familiarity spread across his skin and he took a deep breath, feeling the golden water rush into his lungs.

Vaguely he could hear Duo choking, fighting the intrusion but Heero welcomed it finally feeling as if he had found his place once again...but suddenly it changed.

Somewhere inside his mind a gate was breached and old memories surged outwards, his consciousness immediately became bogged down with the faces of those he had killed and had never been able to forget. Old battles replayed in slow motion, showing him all the decisions he could have made differently...made better.

He tasted blood in his mouth, felt it on his hands and streaming from every pore on his body and suddenly he was choking, surrounded, bathed in the blood of innocents. Everyone who had stood against him was his enemy and they would die...they had died.

The visions moved faster, battering what little remained of his sanity and Heero recognized the presence in the base of his skull, like a familiar bad taste in the back of one's throat.

Zero.

It was inside his head, relentlessly tearing away at the mental barriers he had put in place during the war and that had weakened since then.

It searched for the cracks in his facade as the Perfect Soldier...and it found them. Heero had more to hold onto than he had ever had during the war, giving him more incentive to fight for the small corner of his mind he still called his own...yet those things were also weaknesses, areas of exploitation for the Zero system to achieve its ultimate goal. It wanted destruction, to wipe out life...a world without humans was the only way to ensure that peace would remain...the only way to fix the problem of war...and to wipe out humankind it needed another war.

Heero opened his eyes as he felt the light begin to pulsate and a high pitched mechanical screeching tore at his eardrums. Relena's body stiffened and her hair fell back from her face to reveal her mouth opened in a soundless scream as her face twisted in pain.

Heero could feel the Zero System watching her, considering all of the options and knew, with a dread certainty, that Relena was going to die.

Her death would throw the world back into the cruel throes of war and Zero would live again, its purpose fulfilled. He started forward and felt a malicious glee in the Zero system as it tightened its hold on him. 'Too late', it gloated, 'you're always too late.'

Heero opened his mouth to shout and the light containing Relena exploded. Her body was vapourized, the blood still warm as it coated Heero from head to foot. He fell to his knees as the blood dripped from his face and formed a black pool beneath him, a dark mirror reflecting the anguish on his face back at him.

'Just flesh and blood,'mused the Zero System, 'Just flesh and blood like all humans. So weak...why should just one human stand in the way when life is so fragile?'

Heero looked around but all he could see was blood. The blood of yet another innocent.

The smell choked him, stopping any sound escaping his throat but he could hear sobbing and knew that it wasn't another of his nightmares because Duo had seen it too. He licked his lips as blood had already begun to dry and crack on them and the iron taste was more than he could bear. Body shaking, he retched until he had no strength left, though his reflex continued long after his stomach had emptied. There was a salty dampness on his cheeks, evidence of an emotion he had thought he no longer possessed.

Now alone, in a dark room stained with blood, he struggled to hold onto the little bit of mind he still called his own...the tatters of his sanity if it even still existed.

* * *

When he woke, it was to sheets soaked in sweat and an uncontrollable trembling in his limbs. He tossed the bedcovers into the corner of the room and stalked into the bathroom, furiously massaging one temple to rid himself of the tension he was carrying around like a grudge.

Once in the bathroom he examined himself closely in the mirror...nothing looked any different. But the dream remained as fresh in his memory as if it had just happened; he could see images from it replaying on the backs of his eyelids everytime he blinked. He could still feel the blood drying on his skin, cracking and flaking off...and the skin across his cheekbones felt stretched and stiff with faint residues of salt. Tears; tears he hadn't shed since his first kill when he was still a child...but he couldn't deny the material evidence.

Disturbed, he splashed water on his face and scrubbed all traces of stiffness form his eyelashes. If the dark eyes staring back at him from the mirror were any different it wouldn't show. His mask was intact, unbreakable.

In the shower he alternated between boiling hot and freezing cold water, scrubbing his skin until it was red and raw. He imagined the water swirling away down the drain to be pink, tinged with the blood he could feel all over his body.

As he dressed in his normal uniform and left for work he couldn't help but wonder how many people guessed that a murderer walked among them...that the touch of his hand could kill as easily as assist.

He felt as if his dreams were trapping him, a web of questions and answers that didn't seem to relate to one another. Were his dreams simply nightmares given life by the revival of the Zero System and the trauma it constantly exploited? Or were they a subconscious warning of how dangerous the system could be...how easily he could lose his grip on reality?

Mask firmly in place, next step was to calm the irrational dread in his stomach and make sure that Relena was safe. Grabbing his keys and motorbike helmet he slammed the apartment door behind him, leaving it once again quiet and undisturbed by anything but the unpleasant aftertaste of his nightmares.

* * *

Relena glanced around her office once more, searching for the eyes she could feel watching her. Maybe she was getting paranoid but she doubted it...with a quick flick of her wrist to check her watch she brought her schedule for the day on screen. She had some documents to prepare for a strategy meeting with Lady Une that afternoon, a planned video conference with Quatre at 11 and a diplomatic service meeting shortly after that, but there were no official visitors booked for the morning. Nobody would notice if she took a short break.

Acting on her instincts she looked directly at the main security camera and mouthed a message, "Heero. What's wrong?"

It had to be him; she could always feel his eyes on her.

She knew that all the sound and video feeds led directly into a custom-built module next to her office before being recorded in the central security centre logs. If her suspicions about the distracting eyes on her all morning were correct, that's where Heero would be. The last time he had watched her so closely was after an assassination attempt had come too close for anyone's comfort...Relena herself had been convinced that her time had come.

Heero's regular office was located near the central security mainframe, rather than in the specific module attached to her office but she always trusted her intuition, at least when it came to him.

Almost a full minute passed after she spoke before anything happened. Relena almost smiled, that alone seeming to confirm what she thought she knew. Heero would never let himself be rushed.

There was a barely perceptible click and one of the panels in her room appeared to move slightly. If there was any noise in the room or one didn't know where to look it would be invisible...but Relena knew exactly what to look for.

Standing, she calmly checked the lock on the main office door before walking to the panel and firmly pressing her right hand against it. With another almost inaudible click it opened and she was able to step through into another room. It was tiny, little more than a cupboard and Relena found it claustrophobic as it was crammed with electrical devices, the dusty air almost humming with static energy.

Heero was seated in front of the main monitor, stance deceivingly relaxed. His hand was loose as it sat carelessly on the mouse but Relena could tell that something was bothering him from the stiff set of his shoulders. Staying silent she closed the panel behind her and took a seat next to him. He had transferred data from his computer station in the security mainframe and was obviously keeping up with all he needed to do, but there was a window in the top right of his screen showing the video feed from her office.

As she watched he set the video of her working at the desk on a loop...it would be noticed before long but it would buy them some time. There was no sound so as to give her some semblance of privacy, but she didn't doubt that he had been watching her all morning.

It was something he couldn't explain but she had always been able to tell when he was near her. Many of their friends had commented that they found it uncanny but Relena just accepted it as it was, like so many things about Heero and their odd relationship.

Heero didn't even glance at her as she sat down, not even to acknowledge her with a nod but it didn't bother her like it used to...Heero would speak in his own time. The only sound in the room was the soft hum of the computer, like the breathing of a living creature and the clicks of the keys as Heero's hands danced across the keyboard. Relena let out a held breath and relaxed back into the embrace of the seat, turning her face up towards the ceiling. Just being with Heero made her feel more in control...she didn't stir as his hand moved form the mouse to cover her own, but she opened her eyes to search for an expression on his face. At first he continued to type carelessly with one hand but after a few seconds he turned to meet her gaze. There was something in his eyes that caught her...the closest thing to confusion she had ever seen there. It was almost as if he were asking her for help in the only way he could. Relena leant closer, letting her concern surface, "What happened?"

He paused and licked his lips as if he were considering saying something...then turned back towards the screen and began giving her a standard progress report on the Zero System project in his usual toneless voice.

Relena tried to hide her disappointment but his hand tightened on hers as if he felt it. She responded by intertwining her fingers with his. That small gesture would be the closest he ever came to giving her an apology or saying "Wait for me". Things like the details of his training as a pilot or what he had seen the first time he had encountered the Zero System were questions she would never ask him and information that he was unlikely to ever volunteer. But occasionally he came out with snippets about something that had happened before or during the war and Relena always had the feeling that she was the first and only person to ever hear the disjointed memoirs of the most deadly Gundam pilot. Still, she was aware that she only knew a fraction of the things he had been through.

Relena came back to herself with a start as she realised that Heero had asked her a question and was waiting for an answer. She blushed, "Sorry"

A smirk twisted his mouth, "It's okay"

He checked his watch, "Lady Une's ETA at your office is 2minutes 38 seconds. Don't tell her I'm here"

Relena nodded, so used to odd requests of this sort that she no longer questioned them. She trusted that Heero always had a good reason.

He seemed reluctant to let her go, their fingers lingering together like a long goodbye. As she stood he did too, filling almost all of available space in the tiny room. Heero seemed to be struggling for words again so Relena stepped closer, searching his eyes for what he wanted to say.

An unbidden memory came to her, of the kiss they had shared on an abandoned resource satellite, years previously when words had failed them as they often did. It had left her so confused but neither of them had even mentioned it...the lack of acknowledgement sometimes made Relena question her own memory.

Colour rose to her cheeks and Heero brought a hand up to touch her face, as if to feel the heat of the blush or to smooth it away. They stood that way for what felt like an eternity but was probably only a few seconds. Relena rested against the physical proof that Heero cared, even if nothing were ever said between them. Then just as quickly as that it was over; Heero pulled all tendrils of tentative feelings back inside his shell and turned towards the computer display.

"You should go"

Relena nodded and turned to leave. Heero shifted slightly behind her, "And Relena..."

She paused in the open doorway and looked back, "Yes?"

Heero held her gaze for a second, then looked down, "Nothing"

Relena smiled then, "I promise I'll be careful"

A slight smile broke the severity of his expression but he didn't look up. Relena stepped back into her office, blinking at the sunshine flooding every corner, no room for shadows. She couldn't rid herself of the image of Heero sitting alone in the dark room, while she stood in the sunlight. Working behind the scenes to keep the peace while she worked in the eye of the public...in the shadow created by her light.

Two halves of a whole.

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Author's notes: Thank you as always to all readers and reviewers and I hope to be back soon with the next update!

Player Zero – Sorry to have kept you waiting but hope you enjoyed this chapter too!

Skytyne – I'm really happy that you feel I have captured the characters as i have worked really hard on Aftermath in order to make it as realistic a continuation to the series as possible and to explore my own curiosity about the Zero System and the mental states of all involved in war.

Thanks again for reading – reviews are also greatly appreciated (and read so many times that I can memorize them)

Hope to see you again next chapter!

Chrikaru

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